gel’s blog..

thank you guys so much for the farewell at timo’s place. seriously i would be crying the whole night if it wasnt for all the pictures taken!! hahahaahahahahh but yeah…truly amazing to have u peeps around all this while. cant imagine how i’d be not getting myself involved with u guys. i’ve learnt alot from u guy but i cant name it one by one. hehe

but here i’d like to ask for forgiveness from all of u. forgive me cuz before getting to know u guys better, i thot u all were quite childish. i even thot tat i wont be able to mix well with the group. now i know how wrong i was reli reli sorry. from the bottom of my heart i apologise to all of u for having such a thot about the most beautiful n wonderful youth group i’ve ever had.

thanks for accepting me for who i am. i know i may be loud or maybe too loud as a girl..haha…or sometimes strict..as so some of u claimed last nite..which i dun remember at all,me being strict?? hahaha

but anyways, i’l never ever forget u guys. not a bit of everything we’ve been thru together. u’ can have my word for tat.

YOU GUYS ARE FOREVER IN MY HEART!!!..
I’LL MISS YOU ALL..
LOVE YOU ALL SOOOOOO MUCHIE

it’s been a while since i last posted smth. if u know me well enuff…i dun blog. never bothered spending much time bloggin unless im bored, pissed or just dont know where to express stuff. so here it is…

*from my last post, i was effin pissed. ppl whom i treasured most n whom i thot would have thot the same totally screwed the hell out of our frenship. thru tat, i’ve learnt to accept the worst things tat’ll ever occur in life. the most painful hurt tat i have never imagined, having to pretend im fine when i wont usually do after some big shit just happened or even letting myself go as low as, letting u think tat im stil tat little angelica u thot i once were n treat me the same way u’re owez did. forgive n forget was one of the hardest thing for me to squeeze in to my life but now…its so much more easier!! thanks to u!! thanks for letting me know wat u were thinking about all this while. thanks for putting so damn much attention on me..looking for my ugliness or weaknesses when u dun realize all those crap in ur life..n i dun think u’ll ever will. if u cant accept me for who god created me to be then im sorry. i guess i just dont really need tat much of u in my life.

*i found true frens. ppl whom i never thot i’d actually find such great frenship..honest n true frenship!! sincere from the bottom of their hearts. ppl who accepts me for who i am. be it my weaknesses or strength..beauty or ugliness, none of those affected any part our frenship. we know tat we deserve to be treated wth respect n love. tat is the beauty in everything. accepting it as how it has to be n not trying to make up your own theories to everything n expecting others to live with it.

*my cousin come closest fren i’ve ever had..he’s getting married. im truly happy for him but somehow i feel like i’ve lost a fren. trying to get used to that n i know its gonna be hard as hell sigh!!

well, i guess tat’s life. we cant expect the best to happen in everything. its thru all hard n tough time tat we build ourselves up.without those, we’re just gonna be stuck in the little black box of our lives.

FINALLY LEAVING FOR STUDIES!!!

before this i wanted to leave as soon as i can but now…not anymore. im leaving in like two weeks time..or mayb a few days more..im gonna be so depressed!! i dont wana leave yet. knowing the fact tat i’ll be moving on in almost everything in life. having to find new frens, new church,new youths(which i dont reli look forward to as im gonna miss my darling youths like crazy) n most importantly my mum!!! am i gonna die now having her wit me? i think so. this is tough! !

i just….dont wana leave yet

go ahead n say watever u want about me,those words wont bring me down..at least i know i have an identity n being a true fren!!…at least i know im not a two headed snake..faker!!!!

go ahead n say watever u want about me,those words wont bring me down..at least i know i have an identity n being a true fren!!…at least i know im not a two headed snake..faker!!!!

I didn’t mean it
When I said I didn’t love you so
I should have held on tight
I never should’ve let you go
I did know nothing
I was stupid
I was foolish
I was lying to myself
I could not fathom that I would ever
Be without your love
Never imagined I’d be
Sitting here beside myself

I didn’t know you
I didn’t know me
But I thought I knew everything
I never felt
The feeling that I’m feeling now
Now that I don’t
Hear your voice
Or even touch or even kiss your lips
Cause I don’t have a choice
What I wouldn’t give
To have you lying by my side right here

We belong together
When you left
I lost a part of me
It’s still so hard to believe
Come back baby please
We belong together
Who else am I gonna lean on
When times get rough
Who’s gonna talk to me on the phone
Till the sun comes up
Who’s gonna take your place
Baby nobody else
We belong together

I can’t sleep at night
When you’re all on my mind
Bobby Womack’s on the radio
Singing to me
‘If you think you’re lonely now’
Wait a minute
This is too deep, too deep
I gotta change the station
So I turn the dial
Trying to catch a break
And then I hear Babyface

I only think of you
And it’s breaking my heart
I’m trying to keep it together
But I’m falling apart
I’m feeling all out of my element
I’m throwing things
Crying
Trying to figure out
Where the hell I went wrong
The pain reflected in this song
Ain’t even half of what
I’m feeling inside
I need you
Need you back in my life, baby